Foot fault! Why do we keep believing in this team of Henmans?

Published: 4 February 2010
The Crow

HOW come everybody’s already forgotten the futile attempts of Andy Murray to beat Roger Federer in the Australian Open, but are still banging on about how Arsenal were torn to shreds by Manchester United?
With Murray, it was all done and forgotten with a few tears and a summary from Tim Henman in the studio.
I couldn’t be sure, but did I see Grand Slam-less Henman’s eyes smiling at the result? He said he was sad for the Scot (you notice he’s only “British” when he wins) but I couldn’t help ­thinking that Henman was really thinking: “Ahaaaw, see, winning a Grand Slam is not that easy, is it? I COULD HAVE WON ­WIMBLEDON. I COULD HAVE, HONEST.”
Of course, the great disappointment of ­Henmania for tennis fans was that Tiger Tim always used to get their hopes up.
He used to tease those Henmaniacs with the ­promise that he might some day win something important only to double fault on a big point or tire himself out by pumping too many clenched fists in the early sets. Sad thing is, that’s kind of what’s happening to Arsenal. Just when we are resigned to them not winning anything, they get your hopes up. Once raised, they do a big fat double fault.
A team full of Henmans.
RICHARD OSLEY


SO, Robbie Keane has joined his dream club again – but this time it’s Celtic not Liverpool. And those are Harry Redknapp’s words, not his.
I guess this was one of his less ambitious dreams, a dream so underwhelming and plausible it actually goes down as a bad night’s sleep. It could work out well for all concerned though. Robbie has had a bad season and still bears the scars of his confidence-crushing spell at Anfield, he actually seems to have forgotten which position he plays too.
On several occasions this season he’s been seen careering aimlessly around the left central midfield position, chasing the ball like John Terry chases bad press.
If he can pull off a Georgios Samaras style renaissance in Scotland then we may get the old, dangerous Keane back. It’s worth a try.  
It’s hard to be enthralled by Harry’s activity. Eidur Gudjohnsen, at 31, is about six-years younger than he seems, and Younes Kaboul is the player who epitomised Damien Comolli’s era of bad business. Still, he doesn’t have a chronic injury problem, so there’s a positive.
At the Emirates, Arsenal got a comprehensive beating from United masterminded by Nani.
That’s got to sting.
PIP WROE