Of reds, Eds and brotherly love

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Published: 7 October, 2010
ILLTYD HARRINGTON: ‘AS I PLEASE’

THERE was a time when I sang along optimistically with Bob Dylan – the times they are a changing.

What on earth is happening in this country? George Michael, the anti-war pop star, is banged up in Pentonville for misuse of intelligence. Wayne Rooney, our greatest footballer, says he's going out when his real intention is to leap into a king-size bed with two former convent girls.

And then we come to the panic in the streets caused by one word RED.

This once proud epithet is now the mark of shame. Glenda Jackson, a highly respected Member of Parliament, says sternly he is not “Red Ed” – so what’s wrong with being red?

A group of Oswald Mosley fascists confronted Jack Jones and others at a demonstration. The first neanderthal sneered at our red ties – Jack turned on them and said better that than a black shirt.

I stood with others, now in eminence, shouting “better red, than dead” – against the nuclear madmen. And then there was Red Riding Hood – Erik the Red – who the Vikings say discovered America – and dare I mention it – the Red Army, which quoting Churchill, tore the guts out of the Weimar. We have the Red Arrows. Pumping red white and blue over our skies. 

Now here’s a tale. Dic Penderyn, an early Welsh populist, was hanged in the 1830s for riotous assembly. His co-workers had dipped a white sheet in a bucket of sheep’s blood and carried the first red flag against armed troops who had been sent to put them down. 

Labour establishment figures need not fear this reaction from the coalition. 

Again we have to tackle the fallacy that the family is the place of peace and harmony. Even from earliest times the family has not been all tranquillity. 

At its core there is envy, anger, murder and deceit. 

Read the book of Genesis where Esau and Jacob, sons of the patriarch Isaac, who wanted to assure the succession – it should have been Esau, the older one, but Jacob was the crafty one. He covered his hands in goat’s hair – to deceive the blind father, who anointed him – “the hand is Esau’s, but the voice is Jacob’s”. Esau let out a torrent of Old Testament abuse and stormed off. Thus causing the Great schism between Edomites and the Israelites. 

Somehow I don’t believe the unbreakable fidelity of brothers bears much examination. 

Footballers Jacky and Bobby Charlton sustained an endless silence. Adolf Hitler spent a short time with his brother in Liverpool but was so unsettled he left on his divine mission to destroy the world. King George VI had to deal with the Duke of Windsor whom he had succeeded. We now know that the duke should have answered the charge of high treason. 

Presidents Carter and Clinton had brothers who were drunkards, petty thieves and gamblers. 

But there’s one bright light among all this. Our ally and friend – President Karzai of Afghanistan – he allowed his brother to plunder the national bank and expropriate any land they wished. 

Pope Benedict has a brother, a priest, who thinks the Pope is not right-wing enough. He is not carrying his Bavarian tradition forward. 

• Now to the main item on the agenda. The most insidious of the coalition’s aims is to remove bus passes for the elderly. 

What are the 11 million pensioners going to do. Can’t summon up the SAS to help us. We have to do it for ourselves. With that certainty, which old people grow accustomed to, it is time to act.

A call to arms. Zimmer-owners, possessors of walkers, wheelchairs, walking sticks and good feet! Go over the top and attack ‘em! Press red for danger. Incidentally, the most popular programme on BBC 2 is Dad's Army. Intrepid and lethal. Now is the time for our "The Last Hurrah". Strike fear into these pernicious, parsimonious, bogus patriots.